Calling boys to be men: higher standards

At the Twin Cities Marathon yesterday, between mile 24 and 25, the Minnesota Vikings had a large blow-up Vikings football player, five cheerleaders and Viktor the mascot. Viktor came up to my son, Isaiah, who was wearing a Packers hat, and tried to give him a high-five. Pushing the stroller, I didn't slow down enough for Isaiah to connect and he left him hanging. Cute little Isaiah turned around and said, "Daddy, did you see that guy?" I quickly replied, "No! I didn't see him and we don't talk to those guys." I'm a Packers fan and we don't mingle with the enemy's mascot. When you're a Black (last name), you cheer for the Packers - and against the Vikings - that's just the way it is.

I believe in the promise of Proverbs 22:6 - "train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." There are certain things we do and don't do as Blacks. They were trained in me at a young age and I'm doing the same to my children. This little story was the perfect introduction to something that I've been holding on to for quite some time. I'm going to apply it directly to those who participate in the opportunities at Victory School of Wrestling. It's time to call these boys to a higher standard of living. It's time for them to be men.

We live in a culture that tells young boys often to "be a man." The problem is, they hear this message, but don't get a clear vision for what real manhood looks like. As a result, they buy what the culture is selling them on what it means to be a man. So, we're left with a generation of boys who fall short of the basic standards for their life's direction.

Society tells them that men are consumers (buy and accumulate toys, success, women, etc.) when, in fact, real men are contributors. I get angry every time I see a beer commercial during a football game make the bold claim that drinking a their brand makes you a man. Want to be a man? Then drink Miller Lite. According to their commercials, it's plain and simple. And you should never cry when saying goodbye to the woman you love. This is what our culture tells these young boys. And they buy it. Not only is it disingenuous, it's completely false.

Being a man is about accepting responsibility, rejecting passivity, leading courageously, expecting the greater reward * and being a contributor to our society, not a consumer. Being a man is about setting high standards and keeping them no matter what your buddies say or our society tells us. As men, we need to stand for the things of God, not the things of television and pop culture, and there are things that we should always stand against. We should always stand against the idea that disrespecting women is acceptable. It's not! Men cherish women and respect them simply because they are a woman. We should always stand against compromise and injustice, as if it's part of our rights of passage to bully and haze others. It's not! Men treat others kindly. We should always stand against the attitude that we have it all figured out and our parents, elders and those in authority don't understand what we're going through and they need to leave us alone. Men appreciate those who have gone before them. When you're a MAN, you just don't do certain things.

I'm calling those at Victory, and everyone, for that matter, to stand-up and live a life of higher standards. We must stand for honesty, integrity, respect, chivalry and much more than what we see today. I don't have to look very long on Facebook to see that some of our young men are standing for the wrong things. It's unacceptable and it's time to be the change in the world that we want to see.

To those of you who are influenced by what we do at Victory, consider this your warning. We won't tolerate this any longer. Much the same as Isaiah will grow to understand that, as a Black, there are just certain things we do and don't do; Victory athletes, there are also certain things we do and don't do. It's that simple. We're raising the bar. It's non-negotiable and we will produce men with much higher standards than world offers.


* - reference: Raising a Modern Day Knight by Robert Lewis