Thursday, June 17, 2010

About coaching women

I've been ecstatically married to my beautiful wife Liz for almost seven years. Every single day I learn more about her as a woman. It hasn't been easy and, as a man, doesn't always come naturally. Trying to understand what makes her tick has become a passion and healthy obsession of mine. She's so unique and extremely special that it's worth my effort. The more I understand about her as a woman, the more I see who I am as a man. Conclusion: men and women are very, very different.

Without overgeneralizing each gender, I have learned that men and women are different in many ways. Each is motivated differently, each responds to situations and pressure differently. As genders, each looks at the world through completely different lenses. The differences are so vast that sometimes my brain hurts (which would be consistent with the simplicity of a man's brain--or at least mine).

Since I started coaching female athletes, I've become even more interested in uncovering the differences between men and women. As a coach, I want to know my athletes so I can serve them best. To do that, I've had to delve deep into the mind of the female gender. As a man, that can get very scary! However, as a coach, I owe it to my athletes to at least try to understand where they're coming from (male or female) so I can reach them where they're at. Wrestling is wrestling no matter what gender I'm dealing with, but communicating with each gender is different. This makes coaching both genders very rewarding and rich in content.

Over the next few days, I want to reveal some of the biggest discoveries I've made that have helped me to coach female athletes. I've read some great books, listened to amazing speakers and picked the brain of many great men and women in an attempt to be a sponge and learn as much as I can. Not only have I put effort into learning about the opposite gender, I've put a lot of emotion and energy into applying what I've learned. And, ready for this? It's fun!

Some of my discoveries may surprise people. I believe men and women deserve equal treatment under law, but they need be treated differently because they are created with uniqueness and distinction. Men and women have certain innate characteristics that cannot and should not be ignored. Instead of thinking of this as putting one gender above the other, I've learned to champion our differences and embrace those characteristics.

The total athlete is body, mind and soul. It's crucial to consider all facets of the equation to make a difference and help each athlete become the MAN or the WOMAN that they were created to be.

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