This mindset reveals a lot about the condition of our society and the culture of youth sports - in our case, youth wrestling. The busier we seem to be, the more successful we think we are. This couldn't be further from the truth. Parents sometimes believe that if their son/daughter practices more, they'll win more. Wrestle in more tournaments, in more states, and your son/daughter will have a bright future. Wrong, again.
Our young athletes are participating in sports and living their lives at an unsustainable pace. We call it normal to place children in positions with an abundance of stress and pressure. It's normal for a youth wrestler to compete in far more competitions than our top collegiate athletes. Kids have schedules that are over committing themselves to things that don't matter while sacrificing time for things that do matter. There is very little margin for error in the most important areas in the lives of young athletes.
Young athletes today fill their lives with things that don't matter, making the small things supreme things, like they never have before. I don't think it's as much their fault as it is their parents, though. There are so many opportunities for kids to become the best today (never mind the future), but there's no time for character or spiritual development.
Kids are quitting youth sports at alarming rates because they have no margin in their lives (I can't say that I blame them). Fun is replaced with expectations and pressure to succeed and development is replaced with immediate gratification.
Margin is the difference between our "load" and our "capacity." It's the amount available beyond what is necessary; the difference between what you have and what you need. It's enjoying what you're doing. It's having the emotional capacity to deal with problems when they come up. It's having a few nights a week with nothing on your schedule. It's extra time to invest in others; time to think, reflect, meditate or dream. It's being able to spend significant time with God. Margin is what most of us don't have because we're simply too busy. The irony is that the most significant things in life happen in the margin. It is time to fight against the pull of culture (see Ephesians 5:15-17 below).
Andy Stanley wrote a book called The Best Question Ever and he said the best question we can ask ourselves when we're making a decisions is, "is it wise?" Not is it right or do I have time or what is everyone else doing, but in light of future hopes and dreams, is it wise? Before you make a decision to add another practice, event or competition to yours or your child's schedule, do you ask if it's wise?
By possessing a "production mindset," we often miss the moment. We feel like if we don't have something on the schedule, then we're being unproductive or missing out on something that will push us to the next level or even provide a sense of fulfillment. We believe we have to be busy, but busy doesn't equal productivity. Busy doesn't mean important. Busy isn't meaningful. Just because you have time to do something doesn't mean you should.
We must learn, in courage and faith, to say "no" to many good things so that we can say "yes" to the best things. Too many good things quickly become the enemy of the best things. Is it wise? Do you (and your children) have time in your life for what really matters? Do you have margin? Don't let anyone else talk you out of what's most important.
Be very careful, then, how you live your life - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. - Ephesians 5:15-17
Some of the content above is taken from the series "Margin" by Craig Groeschel of LifeChurch.tv.
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