Last night I saw Jupiter and Venus in the Western sky. They were each extraordinarily bright and close to one another. I love looking at the night sky because the vast universe becomes visible. Radiant stars that are millions of miles away can be seen by the naked eye. I like the reminder than I'm just a tiny, insignificant speck in God's creation. And He still knows my name. Humbling.
I was awe struck on Monday night, as well. I was in my car near Lake Superior and the moon seemed to be brighter than I had ever seen before. It was overcast and the clouds swirled around the bright shining moon and periodically it would break through the clouds and light up the night sky as if it was daylight. During those moments, I'm certain I could have driven without headlights. It was bright and the world's greatest optical illusion made the moon seem to be within driving distance. At approximately 250,000 miles away, it appeared closer than home.
I like to talk about the bright shiny light of the moon, except the moon actually doesn't give of any light of it's own at all. It's a giant rock. Instead, it reflects the light of the sun like a giant mirror. Without the sun, we'd never see the moon. Left to its own device, it would have a very small impact on our lives and we'd probably be unaware of its existence all together. It's the only natural satellite of the Earth and it's gravitational influence produces the ocean tides, however, that's hardly the stuff of ancient mythology, calendars, etc. The mystique of the moon comes from how bright it is in the night sky and the sole reason we're able to see it is because it reflects the sun's light.
I like how this idea of the moon can be applied directly to our lives. On our own, we're less than impressive. Sure, in our own little circle we might have clout, position or prestige, but in the grand scheme of things...we're about as bright and shiny as a rock. That is until we allow our lives to reflect the light of God. It is then that we actually make a difference and have an impact on humanity that can contribute to an eternity. When our lives become a reflection of God, people take notice. Others become fully aware of our existence. It doesn't happen because of who we are, though. I happens because of who God is and what He can do in us and through us. People might enjoy the extraordinary happenings in our lives and be impressed, but all credit is God's. He's the light and we're just a reflection.
Oh, and if you look to the Western sky tonight or tomorrow night, you'll see Jupiter and Venus reflecting the light of the Sun, too.
Let your light shine brightly because it's a reflection of who God is. God's character in our lives cannot be hidden.
“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." - Matthew 5:14-15
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Be choosy about choosing
Last weekend I spent some time with my friend and colleague Shane Sparks. We rapped about how frustrated we get when wrestlers don't take advantage of the opportunity to make a choice. On our broadcast, we talked specifically about choosing to defer after the first period and choosing down because "that's just what you do." Together, we expressed our frustrations with this and are on a mission to get the word out. I suppose there are far more noble topics to bring to the masses, however, there is something profound here, too.
I travel around the state and talk to coaches about a variety of topics. Often times, I hear coaches explain how part of their purpose as a coach is to help athletes learn how to make decisions. It's a great outlook and I'm motivated to do the same. This is why I'm bothered so much by some of those same coaches missing on the potential teachable moments that come from choosing between periods.
In the sport of wrestling, between the first and second periods, one individual is given "choice." He can choose top, bottom, neutral (both on the feet) or defer the choice to his opponent and get choice in the third period. Between the second and third period, the other athlete has choice of top, bottom or neutral. You know the phrase, you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink, right? Well, if the horse is dying of thirst, it's nearly a guarantee that if you lead him to water, he will drink. It undermines the idea of it being a choice. Similarly, if you give an unsure-about-himself teenager the choice to let someone else choose for him, he likely will because he fears responsibility. So, he defers, naturally. Unfortunately, letting others make choices for you often comes with consequences - sometimes big, sometimes small. I'm all for deferring the choice to your opponent if it gives you a strategic advantage. I'm not in favor of deferring the choice by default, though. There isn't much in life that results in good after you defer (think: deferring on your taxes, etc.)
Empowering individuals to make wise choices has the potential to teach young men about responsibility and accountability. Avoiding responsibility (letting others choose for you) can prolong the development of becoming a man. I know, it sounds like I'm blowing everything out of proportion, and maybe I am. However, between periods is the only time in a wrestling that the official stops the action and asks the individual to make a choice...so choose wisely.
Within this same category is the unfortunate phenomenon of choosing "down" without carefully considering if it's the best choice. I try to engage coaches in this conversation and often times I hear responses like this: "you have to be able to get away if you're going to win," "he needs to learn to get away," "we always go down; to get our one," etc., etc. All of these statements lack logic. First of all, you don't have to be able to get away to win. That's just not true unless you're in the final overtime. If he needs to learn to get away, teach him in practice. And always going down is stubbornly stupid. Individuals are empowered in decision making when they see positive results from their choice. Why choose to put someone where they're not good or sure to fail? If your answer is because you always do, that's simply foolish.
As a coach, my responsibility to athletes should be about helping them manage their choices and eventually empowering them to choose wisely on their own. Shame on the coaches who fail to see the opportunity to teach their athletes about responsibility in this category. The impact of the shortsighted decisions they make on behalf of their athletes is appalling. Be choosy about choosing. Every time you have the opportunity to actually choose, no matter how big or small, choose wisely. Make educated and informed decisions.
I travel around the state and talk to coaches about a variety of topics. Often times, I hear coaches explain how part of their purpose as a coach is to help athletes learn how to make decisions. It's a great outlook and I'm motivated to do the same. This is why I'm bothered so much by some of those same coaches missing on the potential teachable moments that come from choosing between periods.
In the sport of wrestling, between the first and second periods, one individual is given "choice." He can choose top, bottom, neutral (both on the feet) or defer the choice to his opponent and get choice in the third period. Between the second and third period, the other athlete has choice of top, bottom or neutral. You know the phrase, you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink, right? Well, if the horse is dying of thirst, it's nearly a guarantee that if you lead him to water, he will drink. It undermines the idea of it being a choice. Similarly, if you give an unsure-about-himself teenager the choice to let someone else choose for him, he likely will because he fears responsibility. So, he defers, naturally. Unfortunately, letting others make choices for you often comes with consequences - sometimes big, sometimes small. I'm all for deferring the choice to your opponent if it gives you a strategic advantage. I'm not in favor of deferring the choice by default, though. There isn't much in life that results in good after you defer (think: deferring on your taxes, etc.)
Empowering individuals to make wise choices has the potential to teach young men about responsibility and accountability. Avoiding responsibility (letting others choose for you) can prolong the development of becoming a man. I know, it sounds like I'm blowing everything out of proportion, and maybe I am. However, between periods is the only time in a wrestling that the official stops the action and asks the individual to make a choice...so choose wisely.
Within this same category is the unfortunate phenomenon of choosing "down" without carefully considering if it's the best choice. I try to engage coaches in this conversation and often times I hear responses like this: "you have to be able to get away if you're going to win," "he needs to learn to get away," "we always go down; to get our one," etc., etc. All of these statements lack logic. First of all, you don't have to be able to get away to win. That's just not true unless you're in the final overtime. If he needs to learn to get away, teach him in practice. And always going down is stubbornly stupid. Individuals are empowered in decision making when they see positive results from their choice. Why choose to put someone where they're not good or sure to fail? If your answer is because you always do, that's simply foolish.
As a coach, my responsibility to athletes should be about helping them manage their choices and eventually empowering them to choose wisely on their own. Shame on the coaches who fail to see the opportunity to teach their athletes about responsibility in this category. The impact of the shortsighted decisions they make on behalf of their athletes is appalling. Be choosy about choosing. Every time you have the opportunity to actually choose, no matter how big or small, choose wisely. Make educated and informed decisions.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Wrestling and the Academy Awards
The objective of the Academy Awards is to recognize every aspect of the film industry. As movie goers, we only see a small percentage of the work required for two hours of suspended belief and entertainment. The Academy presents Oscars in categories that seem obscure to those outside the industry like visual effects, sound editing, etc. These are essential to the completion of the movie and the Academy wants to honor the behind the scenes work, too.
Most movies take well over a year to complete. Hundreds of people and thousands of hours are a part of the pain staking process to release a film. The winner of Best Picture always wins a few awards in the other less known categories like musical score and art direction, as was the case with “The Artist” this year (it also nabbed best actor and best director).
At the high school state wrestling tournament, we see only the finished product. We’re privileged to see on display great athletes for a few precious minutes while many hours and years have gone into making them a reality. What happens behind the scenes is what makes that moment possible for these athletes. The quality of the finished product is a result of years of preparation and an abundance of support long before the end is even in sight. Behind the finished product of most of the best athletes are categories like best work ethic, best coach, best original or adapted plan. Often times, those that win the prestigious award of state champion also take home awards in other categories like best work ethic, best original or adapted plan or even best coach. Similar to the film that wins best picture, winning the top award is almost always accompanied by other awards.
Unfortunately, the finished product also reveals holes in the preparation process. We’ve all seen movies that are less than desirable in a number of areas. The DaVinci Code, for example, was one of the best books written in the past decade, but the movie was average. It had a terrific cast and financial support, but the “adapted screen play” lacked the creativity to win any Academy Awards. We’ve also seen movies win awards in those obscure categories and miss out on the bigger, more recognizable awards. Such is the case with athletes and the state tournament. An athlete might win best work ethic and fall short of the biggest award. You don’t get to win best picture if you lack quality directing or editing just like you don’t win a state title if you lack work ethic and basic skills. A movie can make a lot of money and generate popularity and not be a good movie. When it comes to winning those prestigious awards, however, the quality of work behind the scenes is revealed and nearly 100% of the time the awards go to those who deserve them. The same is true on Saturday night in the Kohl Center. Those who win the state championship deserve it and have earned it with their behind the scenes work.
Fans might be surprised by outcomes on several occasions, however, it’s never a surprise to those associated with these winning athletes because they witness the behind the scenes work. Metaphorically, these young men had already earned other more obscure awards that led to the climax of the awards presentation.
When I finish watching a movie, I sit through the credits. I don’t do it because I’m looking for anyone or anything specific. In fact, I usually don’t know what I’m looking at. I do it out of respect for those who put in the years of work so I could suspend reality for two hours. I do it on principle. I sit for the extra six minutes because it reminds me that the finished product doesn’t happen by accident.
Most movies take well over a year to complete. Hundreds of people and thousands of hours are a part of the pain staking process to release a film. The winner of Best Picture always wins a few awards in the other less known categories like musical score and art direction, as was the case with “The Artist” this year (it also nabbed best actor and best director).
At the high school state wrestling tournament, we see only the finished product. We’re privileged to see on display great athletes for a few precious minutes while many hours and years have gone into making them a reality. What happens behind the scenes is what makes that moment possible for these athletes. The quality of the finished product is a result of years of preparation and an abundance of support long before the end is even in sight. Behind the finished product of most of the best athletes are categories like best work ethic, best coach, best original or adapted plan. Often times, those that win the prestigious award of state champion also take home awards in other categories like best work ethic, best original or adapted plan or even best coach. Similar to the film that wins best picture, winning the top award is almost always accompanied by other awards.
Unfortunately, the finished product also reveals holes in the preparation process. We’ve all seen movies that are less than desirable in a number of areas. The DaVinci Code, for example, was one of the best books written in the past decade, but the movie was average. It had a terrific cast and financial support, but the “adapted screen play” lacked the creativity to win any Academy Awards. We’ve also seen movies win awards in those obscure categories and miss out on the bigger, more recognizable awards. Such is the case with athletes and the state tournament. An athlete might win best work ethic and fall short of the biggest award. You don’t get to win best picture if you lack quality directing or editing just like you don’t win a state title if you lack work ethic and basic skills. A movie can make a lot of money and generate popularity and not be a good movie. When it comes to winning those prestigious awards, however, the quality of work behind the scenes is revealed and nearly 100% of the time the awards go to those who deserve them. The same is true on Saturday night in the Kohl Center. Those who win the state championship deserve it and have earned it with their behind the scenes work.
Fans might be surprised by outcomes on several occasions, however, it’s never a surprise to those associated with these winning athletes because they witness the behind the scenes work. Metaphorically, these young men had already earned other more obscure awards that led to the climax of the awards presentation.
When I finish watching a movie, I sit through the credits. I don’t do it because I’m looking for anyone or anything specific. In fact, I usually don’t know what I’m looking at. I do it out of respect for those who put in the years of work so I could suspend reality for two hours. I do it on principle. I sit for the extra six minutes because it reminds me that the finished product doesn’t happen by accident.
Friday, February 24, 2012
The Thing About a Crossing
I'm in the Kohl Center during a break of the state wrestling tournament. We're half way through the event on the schedule - in the middle - and I'm reading through a few hand written notes. I took them during a book I just finished, A Million Miles In A Thousand Days by Donald Miller. It's a MUST read. I promise.
In chapter 28, The Thing About a Crossing, Miller writes, "The reward you get from a story is always less than you thought it would be, and the work is harder than you imagined. The point of a story is never about the ending, remember. It's about your character getting molded in the hard work of the middle."
This quote became even more relevant to me after I talked to an athlete who had his sights set on becoming a state champion this weekend, but lost first round. It was a heartbreaking loss because it was very close and he was the top ranked wrestler in the state. He would give anything to have that moment back, but it will never come back. That dream will never be realized. He's a senior and he's still wrestling on the consolation side of the bracket. What do you tell a teenager who, only moments ago, had his heart broken in front of thousands of people and now must go back out in front of the same people and wrestle for something, that frankly, he doesn't want? This is a bit of a crossroads, wouldn't you say?
I granted him the permission to be upset because this isn't what he wanted. This isn't what he came here for. That doesn't mean the weekend is over, though. He still has something to fight for and it doesn't have anything to do with what place he earns. He must still give it his all. He has to go down swinging. He has to do all of this because his character depends on it. Who he is to become is directly dependent on how he handles this adverse situation. Growing and developing into a man requires that he now, more than ever, fights back. With a setback like this, everything is on the line.
The quote is very straightforward; we don't like the middle of the story because of the character development. We want to know how it ends. We don't like being in the middle because we don't know how it ends and it's hard. Really hard, but that's were the growth happens. The awkward, unpleasant middle is about hard work and perseverance and that's the stuff that makes the man. I'm not saying winning isn't important and I'm not saying that those that win won't become men. I'm saying that it's harder on your soul to come back and finish third. It's easy to stay positive when everything is going well. It's easy to prepare when you're winning.
True character is formed and molded in the middle and during the consolation rounds. Character development is worth fighting for.
In chapter 28, The Thing About a Crossing, Miller writes, "The reward you get from a story is always less than you thought it would be, and the work is harder than you imagined. The point of a story is never about the ending, remember. It's about your character getting molded in the hard work of the middle."
This quote became even more relevant to me after I talked to an athlete who had his sights set on becoming a state champion this weekend, but lost first round. It was a heartbreaking loss because it was very close and he was the top ranked wrestler in the state. He would give anything to have that moment back, but it will never come back. That dream will never be realized. He's a senior and he's still wrestling on the consolation side of the bracket. What do you tell a teenager who, only moments ago, had his heart broken in front of thousands of people and now must go back out in front of the same people and wrestle for something, that frankly, he doesn't want? This is a bit of a crossroads, wouldn't you say?
I granted him the permission to be upset because this isn't what he wanted. This isn't what he came here for. That doesn't mean the weekend is over, though. He still has something to fight for and it doesn't have anything to do with what place he earns. He must still give it his all. He has to go down swinging. He has to do all of this because his character depends on it. Who he is to become is directly dependent on how he handles this adverse situation. Growing and developing into a man requires that he now, more than ever, fights back. With a setback like this, everything is on the line.
The quote is very straightforward; we don't like the middle of the story because of the character development. We want to know how it ends. We don't like being in the middle because we don't know how it ends and it's hard. Really hard, but that's were the growth happens. The awkward, unpleasant middle is about hard work and perseverance and that's the stuff that makes the man. I'm not saying winning isn't important and I'm not saying that those that win won't become men. I'm saying that it's harder on your soul to come back and finish third. It's easy to stay positive when everything is going well. It's easy to prepare when you're winning.
True character is formed and molded in the middle and during the consolation rounds. Character development is worth fighting for.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
If you're not enough without it, you'll never be enough with it
The high school state tournament starts tomorrow and many athletes are going to have their dreams realized. Many more won't. Regardless of the desirable outcome, this event has the potential to go down as one of the most memorable moments in the lives of these athletes.
We've been hard at work at Victory School of Wrestling in anticipation of this weekend. A large number of athletes have bought into the system and will hit their current physical, mental and emotional peak as a wrestler on Saturday night in the Kohl Center. The work is done and it's time to see those visualizations play out in real time.
This is an exciting time for many of us as athletes, coaches and fans. The season builds to this event. That's why it makes sense that many of these young men are actually quite scared and unsure of themselves right now. Strange, huh? We might be excited, but they might be petrified. They put a lot of pressure on these three days to perform to their expectations (and win). They've also put a lot of pressure on the situation or desirable outcome to fulfill them in some abstract way. That's when it all can become destructive and they're scared because that's scary.
I spend a lot of time speaking greatness into the lives of our athletes and casting vision for their athletic careers and beyond. Within those categories, I'm quick to point out that winning a state title will not add value to one's life. It can be exciting and fun, for sure, however, it won't come to define them or give their life meaning or value. The famous one-liner that we repeat at Victory is, "when you wake up the day after you win a state title, it will be Sunday, just like every other weekend." No value is gained or significance acquired. It's a great feat and athletic accomplish, but that's it. Our sports culture has some how communicated that state titles, national championships or Olympic gold medals will make us happy or fulfill us. A gold medal is a wonderful thing - but if you're not enough without it, you'll never be enough with it.* These young men must know this if they are to give it their all and take the steps necessary towards becoming the men of character and integrity they were created to be.
The most relevant and important information that I try to convey to my athletes is that I actually don't care if they win or lose. Did you catch that? I don't care. It makes no difference to me. Now, truth be told, I do want them to win and because I'm invested in them, I'd love to see them accomplish the goals they've set out to. I don't lose sleep over the wins and losses, though (well, there are still a few losses that creep back into the forefront of my brain on occasion). What I'm concerned with is that they...cliche...give it their all. It's true, that's what matters to me. My role in their life is to demand this and pull it out of them. If they're able to focus and take care of the process, the desirable outcome is likely to happen. Or maybe it won't. Doing your best and being your best is the requirement needed to begin using these opportunities as building blocks to becoming the man God created you to be. Too many people place too high an emphasis on winning and losing and not enough on what happens during the six minutes.
Don't misunderstand me, I want the athletes that I work with to win. And I cheer for them, jump up and down and do a few fist pumps in the process, but an overwhelmingly positive attitude and undying effort is what I expect. Attitude and effort is 100% within your own control. So I say, control it. If they focus on the process and go all in (Blaze of Glory reference to those in-the-know) I'm pleased and happy for my athletes. I believe they know this and it gives them a sense of freedom to not be competing with winning and losing at the top of their list. The outcome of events and matches don't last, but the character developed along the way does.
One of my favorite movies of all-time is Gladiator. It's an epic story of a Roman soldier turned slave and gladiator. It's about the struggle of identity. It's one of the biggest struggles we face as human beings, isn't it? Wrestlers face this struggle at the state tournament, too. My encouragement is to be yourself. Anything that requires you to be somebody other than yourself is not worth your time (this includes sports). Identity before activity is our mantra. Know who you are and you'll know what to do. This includes living our lives to the fullest (giving it your all).
"When you sacrifice your life, you must make fullest use of your weaponry. It is false not to do so and to die with a weapon yet un-drawn." - Miyamoto Musashi
*the gold medal quote is from Cool Runnings with John Candy
We've been hard at work at Victory School of Wrestling in anticipation of this weekend. A large number of athletes have bought into the system and will hit their current physical, mental and emotional peak as a wrestler on Saturday night in the Kohl Center. The work is done and it's time to see those visualizations play out in real time.
This is an exciting time for many of us as athletes, coaches and fans. The season builds to this event. That's why it makes sense that many of these young men are actually quite scared and unsure of themselves right now. Strange, huh? We might be excited, but they might be petrified. They put a lot of pressure on these three days to perform to their expectations (and win). They've also put a lot of pressure on the situation or desirable outcome to fulfill them in some abstract way. That's when it all can become destructive and they're scared because that's scary.
I spend a lot of time speaking greatness into the lives of our athletes and casting vision for their athletic careers and beyond. Within those categories, I'm quick to point out that winning a state title will not add value to one's life. It can be exciting and fun, for sure, however, it won't come to define them or give their life meaning or value. The famous one-liner that we repeat at Victory is, "when you wake up the day after you win a state title, it will be Sunday, just like every other weekend." No value is gained or significance acquired. It's a great feat and athletic accomplish, but that's it. Our sports culture has some how communicated that state titles, national championships or Olympic gold medals will make us happy or fulfill us. A gold medal is a wonderful thing - but if you're not enough without it, you'll never be enough with it.* These young men must know this if they are to give it their all and take the steps necessary towards becoming the men of character and integrity they were created to be.
The most relevant and important information that I try to convey to my athletes is that I actually don't care if they win or lose. Did you catch that? I don't care. It makes no difference to me. Now, truth be told, I do want them to win and because I'm invested in them, I'd love to see them accomplish the goals they've set out to. I don't lose sleep over the wins and losses, though (well, there are still a few losses that creep back into the forefront of my brain on occasion). What I'm concerned with is that they...cliche...give it their all. It's true, that's what matters to me. My role in their life is to demand this and pull it out of them. If they're able to focus and take care of the process, the desirable outcome is likely to happen. Or maybe it won't. Doing your best and being your best is the requirement needed to begin using these opportunities as building blocks to becoming the man God created you to be. Too many people place too high an emphasis on winning and losing and not enough on what happens during the six minutes.
Don't misunderstand me, I want the athletes that I work with to win. And I cheer for them, jump up and down and do a few fist pumps in the process, but an overwhelmingly positive attitude and undying effort is what I expect. Attitude and effort is 100% within your own control. So I say, control it. If they focus on the process and go all in (Blaze of Glory reference to those in-the-know) I'm pleased and happy for my athletes. I believe they know this and it gives them a sense of freedom to not be competing with winning and losing at the top of their list. The outcome of events and matches don't last, but the character developed along the way does.
One of my favorite movies of all-time is Gladiator. It's an epic story of a Roman soldier turned slave and gladiator. It's about the struggle of identity. It's one of the biggest struggles we face as human beings, isn't it? Wrestlers face this struggle at the state tournament, too. My encouragement is to be yourself. Anything that requires you to be somebody other than yourself is not worth your time (this includes sports). Identity before activity is our mantra. Know who you are and you'll know what to do. This includes living our lives to the fullest (giving it your all).
"When you sacrifice your life, you must make fullest use of your weaponry. It is false not to do so and to die with a weapon yet un-drawn." - Miyamoto Musashi
*the gold medal quote is from Cool Runnings with John Candy
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Called by God to play a role in His story
I don't know how to describe this, but I know without hesitation that God has called me to run Victory School of Wrestling. I have understood with 100% certainty only a few things that I believe God commissioned me to do in my life. Coaching wrestling and being an influence in the lives of athletes by operating my own club is one of them.
God didn't show up in a burning bush or some other obvious way, though. Instead, He continually reconfirms that my desires are His desires through every book I read, person I talk to, sermon I hear and church service I attend. That's how He's revealed the role He wants me to play in this story.
Victory has been opened for six years and God has graciously taken care of the athletes who participate and me as their coach. He's provided me unlimited opportunities to make a real difference in the lives of young men and women and I have seen God's glory revealed through what takes place in us and through us. There have been numerous examples of how the time invested at Victory (by the athletes, parents and coaches) has paid huge dividends. God is faithful, that's for sure!
All of this said and understood, I've done my best to be transparent and demonstrate my faith in an authentic way through Victory School of Wrestling. In that spirit, I'm quick to share both triumphs and struggles with athletes and parents. As the leader and authoritative figurehead within the club, those who look to me must see me looking to God. Of course, I have mentors and other leaders who are influential in my life, but God is my ultimate authority and coach.
It's very easy to work with exceptional athletes who are generally high achievers and wonderful human beings with great character. It's also easy to trust God when He is coming through day in and day out to keep the lights on. It's a little more difficult when the pressures and realities of life sink in and challenge to take away this well-oiled machine.
Like nearly every small business in the United States in 2011, our expenses went up and our income went down. It was easily predicted and God showed up time in and time out to make ends meet. However, the reality is that 2012 is going to be drastically different. Add to the equation that our lease on the building that currently occupies Victory School of Wrestling will expire in the fall. This has thrust me into a serious quandary of what to do next. I've had to think outside the box. I'm sure many of you can identify...
Here's the point, though, it's easy to follow and trust God with the direction of our lives when everything is "hunky dory." As He provides and takes care of us, we're quick to praise Him and enjoy our circumstances. It gets a little more difficult when your story and what He's clearly called you to do involves pain, expenses, financial distress, etc. and you don't know what to do, doesn't it?
I have hope in knowing God doesn't plan the end without planning the means. But it's still scary. It's scary because I don't know how it ends. I'm not sure if He'll provide a way for us to continue operating in the same building or if we're supposed to move. Maybe He will "gift" us a facility. I've seen it happen. Maybe we'll re-negotiate and sign another lease, purchase something or dismantle all together. Or do something in between. Regardless of how it ends, I have an integral part in the story to play right now. That's not quit as fun and it's not full of "Hallelujahs" and "Praise God" sentiments. I have to make phone calls, weigh-out options and consider many different scenarios. It's hard work and it comes with uncertainty. If I didn't live this part of my life out loud like the times it's easy to say, "Amen!" what kind of faith would I be demonstrating?
Often times, the saddest parts of our story aren't things we do; instead, they're things we won't do that God has called us to do. We don't get to depend on God's sovereignty by being irresponsible and apathetic. It's not always sunshine and rainbows, but once you know what it takes to live a better story and to follow the story of God, you don't have a choice.
God didn't show up in a burning bush or some other obvious way, though. Instead, He continually reconfirms that my desires are His desires through every book I read, person I talk to, sermon I hear and church service I attend. That's how He's revealed the role He wants me to play in this story.
Victory has been opened for six years and God has graciously taken care of the athletes who participate and me as their coach. He's provided me unlimited opportunities to make a real difference in the lives of young men and women and I have seen God's glory revealed through what takes place in us and through us. There have been numerous examples of how the time invested at Victory (by the athletes, parents and coaches) has paid huge dividends. God is faithful, that's for sure!
All of this said and understood, I've done my best to be transparent and demonstrate my faith in an authentic way through Victory School of Wrestling. In that spirit, I'm quick to share both triumphs and struggles with athletes and parents. As the leader and authoritative figurehead within the club, those who look to me must see me looking to God. Of course, I have mentors and other leaders who are influential in my life, but God is my ultimate authority and coach.
It's very easy to work with exceptional athletes who are generally high achievers and wonderful human beings with great character. It's also easy to trust God when He is coming through day in and day out to keep the lights on. It's a little more difficult when the pressures and realities of life sink in and challenge to take away this well-oiled machine.
Like nearly every small business in the United States in 2011, our expenses went up and our income went down. It was easily predicted and God showed up time in and time out to make ends meet. However, the reality is that 2012 is going to be drastically different. Add to the equation that our lease on the building that currently occupies Victory School of Wrestling will expire in the fall. This has thrust me into a serious quandary of what to do next. I've had to think outside the box. I'm sure many of you can identify...
Here's the point, though, it's easy to follow and trust God with the direction of our lives when everything is "hunky dory." As He provides and takes care of us, we're quick to praise Him and enjoy our circumstances. It gets a little more difficult when your story and what He's clearly called you to do involves pain, expenses, financial distress, etc. and you don't know what to do, doesn't it?
I have hope in knowing God doesn't plan the end without planning the means. But it's still scary. It's scary because I don't know how it ends. I'm not sure if He'll provide a way for us to continue operating in the same building or if we're supposed to move. Maybe He will "gift" us a facility. I've seen it happen. Maybe we'll re-negotiate and sign another lease, purchase something or dismantle all together. Or do something in between. Regardless of how it ends, I have an integral part in the story to play right now. That's not quit as fun and it's not full of "Hallelujahs" and "Praise God" sentiments. I have to make phone calls, weigh-out options and consider many different scenarios. It's hard work and it comes with uncertainty. If I didn't live this part of my life out loud like the times it's easy to say, "Amen!" what kind of faith would I be demonstrating?
Often times, the saddest parts of our story aren't things we do; instead, they're things we won't do that God has called us to do. We don't get to depend on God's sovereignty by being irresponsible and apathetic. It's not always sunshine and rainbows, but once you know what it takes to live a better story and to follow the story of God, you don't have a choice.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Badgering referees
Last weekend I went to a high school wrestling tournament, and wow, some wrestling coaches are jerks! I'm sure this is the case in every sport, but put it this way: there were are a few who definitely made the rest look better. I have no problem calling out colleagues in this manner. I was particularly appalled by how poorly a few decided to treat the referees.
Maybe I've become more aware of this because my dad puts blood, sweat and, yes, even tears into wearing the stripes. He often tells me about coaches who are out of line and belligerent. I see it from the stands as a spectator and from the corner as a coach, but it doesn't affect me directly. It does affect him. That's not why I'm sharing this topic. If an adult can treat another human being in public like what I saw, how are they treating people when no one is looking? How do they treat their athletes? This worries me for many reasons.
One coach, who was out of line the entire day, acted completely childish as he was inappropriately badgering a referee about the way he called stalling. He was out of his chair and in the wrestling area. The referee patiently and respectfully asked him to back up. The coach put his feet together like a 4 year old and took two minuscule steps back, pouted and asked the referee if it was far enough. Seriously, that actually happened. In real life. A grown man acted like an infant in front of hundreds of others in an attempt to prove a point. The point he made was that he's an arrogant prick. Throughout the day, this particular individual instructed the referees more than his athletes. It all sounds very dramatic, doesn't it? Sadly, the truth is that it's just par for the course at high school tournaments.
Actions and behaviors like what I saw last weekend make it obvious to me why we have a referee shortage. Why would someone want to spend their Saturday getting raked over the coals for $75? Of course, they're their for the kids and want to give back to the sport, but an individual can only handle so much unnecessary ridicule. The irony is that many of these self-entitled coaches who believe they're exempt from the rules tell their athletes to give back to the sport. Why? So he can yell at them, too?
A quick solution that is easy in theory and difficult in practice is, as a wrestling community, we need to empower referees to hold coaches demonstrating this type of behavior accountable. Follow the rule book. When a coach questions the judgement of a referee it's a "warning." In almost every tight high school wrestling match, at least one coach challenges the referee about the way he chooses to call stalling. The moment the coach walks towards the table to complain - during or after the match - give him an official warning. The second time, get rid of him. It's time to bring down the long arm of the law on these jack wagons. Sounds simple. The catch is that these coaches rank the referees, so they hold the power. A coach can critique and hammer the referee (some coaches inappropriately call this holding referees accountable), but the referee is powerless to hold the coach accountable. On playgrounds, they call these coaches "bullies."
This is a serious issue in our sport. It's time to draw attention to combating this problem. Coaches, call out other coaches when they're inappropriate (one coach did this last weekend and fans cheered). Referees, hold these coaches accountable. Parents, expect better behavior from the men coaching your children. They're role models and more is caught than is taught. Attitude reflects leadership, so look at the attitude and conduct of the leader in your program. Speak out.
Maybe I've become more aware of this because my dad puts blood, sweat and, yes, even tears into wearing the stripes. He often tells me about coaches who are out of line and belligerent. I see it from the stands as a spectator and from the corner as a coach, but it doesn't affect me directly. It does affect him. That's not why I'm sharing this topic. If an adult can treat another human being in public like what I saw, how are they treating people when no one is looking? How do they treat their athletes? This worries me for many reasons.
One coach, who was out of line the entire day, acted completely childish as he was inappropriately badgering a referee about the way he called stalling. He was out of his chair and in the wrestling area. The referee patiently and respectfully asked him to back up. The coach put his feet together like a 4 year old and took two minuscule steps back, pouted and asked the referee if it was far enough. Seriously, that actually happened. In real life. A grown man acted like an infant in front of hundreds of others in an attempt to prove a point. The point he made was that he's an arrogant prick. Throughout the day, this particular individual instructed the referees more than his athletes. It all sounds very dramatic, doesn't it? Sadly, the truth is that it's just par for the course at high school tournaments.
Actions and behaviors like what I saw last weekend make it obvious to me why we have a referee shortage. Why would someone want to spend their Saturday getting raked over the coals for $75? Of course, they're their for the kids and want to give back to the sport, but an individual can only handle so much unnecessary ridicule. The irony is that many of these self-entitled coaches who believe they're exempt from the rules tell their athletes to give back to the sport. Why? So he can yell at them, too?
A quick solution that is easy in theory and difficult in practice is, as a wrestling community, we need to empower referees to hold coaches demonstrating this type of behavior accountable. Follow the rule book. When a coach questions the judgement of a referee it's a "warning." In almost every tight high school wrestling match, at least one coach challenges the referee about the way he chooses to call stalling. The moment the coach walks towards the table to complain - during or after the match - give him an official warning. The second time, get rid of him. It's time to bring down the long arm of the law on these jack wagons. Sounds simple. The catch is that these coaches rank the referees, so they hold the power. A coach can critique and hammer the referee (some coaches inappropriately call this holding referees accountable), but the referee is powerless to hold the coach accountable. On playgrounds, they call these coaches "bullies."
This is a serious issue in our sport. It's time to draw attention to combating this problem. Coaches, call out other coaches when they're inappropriate (one coach did this last weekend and fans cheered). Referees, hold these coaches accountable. Parents, expect better behavior from the men coaching your children. They're role models and more is caught than is taught. Attitude reflects leadership, so look at the attitude and conduct of the leader in your program. Speak out.
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