As a Christian, do you really believe in God?

Have you ever noticed, at times, those who claim to be Christians actually believe in God less than those who claim to be anything but a Christian? I heard a story about how a church was meeting regularly to pray for the closing of a strip club next door. The owner of the club was aware of this and when lightning struck his building, burning it to the ground, he sued the church. While in court, the judge listened to each side argue about what had happened and he struck his gavel and said, "I can't believe what I'm hearing. In my court room I have the pastor of a church saying that prayer doesn't work while the owner of a strip club says it does."

I don't know if this is a true story, but I don't think it matters because the message is loud and clear. Christians believe in God when it makes sense and at times choose to forget about Him when it doesn't. Sometimes, often times, non-Christians believe in God more than those who devote their life to Him.

I had an athlete approach me about another athlete needing prayer. In fact, this individual asked the first athlete if she could ask me to pray for her and her friend who was in critical condition. She's not a Christian and has been open about being agnostic and/or atheist. But she asked me to pray for her? Why? She doesn't believe in prayer, right? Well, I did pray. I wasn't certain on how to pray, so I basically prayed that she would see that God is real in the midst of this situation. If I'm honest, I was little scared to pull out the healing prayer at that time because I didn't want to use up any favor God might have for me down the line, as if it's a coupon or something with limits. Pathetic, I know. If I wasn't aware of my lack of faith in that situation already, God hit me even harder when this individual sent me a thoughtful message thanking me for my thoughts and prayers. She explained that her friend had recovered very quickly and was in good condition, nearly healed. She believed in God's ability to heal her friend more than I did? I'm the Christian; she's not. Why did she trust God in that situation before I did, especially considering she doesn't even know if He exists?

Here's another one...two nights ago, around 2:00 a.m., Isaiah woke up and hollered, "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" I went into his room to check on him and he was sitting up in his bed (this doesn't happen much). He said he wasn't tired and wanted me to lay by him. So, of course, I did. As we started laying back, he pointed across the room and said, "tell that guy to go away." Confused, I said, "what guy?" "That guy over there," he pointed towards the rocking chair. "There's no one over there, buddy." "Yeah, there is. Over there. That guy. Tell him to go away." So I went over to the rocking chair, scared out of my mind, by the way, and moved my arms around and said, "see there's no one over here." I went back to lay with him and he told me the guy was sitting down in the rocking chair. I was really, really scared. I started praying like crazy. I told God I was really scared and I asked Him to protect our house and assured Him I was aware of His promises to answer calls like this. Still, I was scared. I'll add, the lighting was kind of creepy, too. We laid there for a few minutes until Isaiah fell back asleep and I left his room with my heart racing. No way was I going to tell Liz what Isaiah had said at 2:00 a.m. She would have freaked. Later, the garbage truck woke Isaiah up before Liz left for work, so we all got to talk about that moment together at 7:00 a.m. We asked what Isaiah saw and he said, "it wasn't anything. It was just clothes." There were clothes hanging over the arms of the rocking chair. Without regard for what he just said, Liz asked what the guy looked like. Isaiah said he had a brown face and rubbed his own cheeks and chin, almost like he was imagining a beard. Crazy...

I'm not going to read into that situation much and I've tried to push some of it out of my mind. I don't believe in ghosts and don't think our house is haunted. I do believe in angels, though. I believe there is a heavenly realm that is active and real. Liz told this story to a few others and one of her co-workers (a non-church goer) said, "maybe it was God just passing through." Of course. What was I thinking? Why was I scared? It could have been something entirely holy, if it was anything at all. I'm the Christian, right? Why would I make the assumption it was anything BUT God? I know this is why God and the angels always introduce themselves with the premise, "don't be frightened..." I was frightened. And I just saw clothes hanging on the rocking chair.

I'm always miffed when non-Christians believe in God, and the things of God, more than Christians do. More than I do. What is it about me that creates that instantaneous doubt? If we try to deny and hide from God, He can be very, very scary. However, if we move towards Him and accept the things of Him, He's very comforting. Why would I do anything besides move in His direction? God is real. The things of God are real and His promises are real.

Kickball bullies

I drove past an elementary school today and saw a class of kids playing kickball. I love playground games. I wish I still had my recess years at my disposal. I miss it. I don't miss that kid who tried to ruin it for everyone, though.

I asked my brother what it is about me that makes me dislike that kid who, while playing pitcher, rolls the ball so hard that no one can kick the ball. He told me it's because that kid is a bully. It's true. He's a bully. His objective is to make life miserable for everyone else while he gets to laugh. I really don't like that. In kickball, everyone should have the opportunity to kick the ball. That's why it's called "kick" ball. It defeats the purpose when the pitcher doesn't let anyone else play.

I despise bullying. It's a major pet peeve of mine and angers me on a very deep level. I just thought I'd share...

MMQB: First Edition

A Monday Morning Quarterback (MMQB) - A person who criticizes or passes judgement with benefit of hindsight.

Every Monday morning I try to wrap my mind around the wealth of knowledge that I acquired while watching football from my couch. I end up spending most of the day sending text messages and e-mails to my friends about what transpired on the gridiron. A lot of the ideas that I take away from a weekend of football have the potential to be useful in the lives of those who read this blog. So, without further ado, I announce to you my own version of Monday Morning Quarterback. This could be interesting...

Week 3 is complete, with the exception of tonight's Monday Night Football game, and there have been some interesting surprises (Buffalo Bills) as well as a few things that were expected (Packers 3-0, Vikings 0-3).

Off the top of my head, here's what I saw:

* The Packers are really, really good. I'm extremely bias and will never attempt to hide that fact. Actually, I'm proud to bleed green and gold. Still, they're really good. They have yet to play a "complete" game and have dominated the NFL. The scary thing is Aaron Rodgers is going to get better, which seems unbelievable, and their defense will start to figure things out, too.

* The Buffalo Bills will be in every game they play this year. I'm not ready to say they're the best team in the AFC. Even after beating the Patriots, I still think New England has a better team. Chan Gailey and Dave Wannsteadt work extremely well together and have taken teams to the playoffs together more than once (most recently the Miami Dolphins). Watch out for these guys. As long as Fitzpatrick is at the helm, they're dangerous. Especially because he's starting to develop a few legitimate weapons and seems to make everyone else on the offense better. This should be expected from a Harvard grad.

* The Vikings are really, really ugly. I already said it, I'm bias, but that really has nothing to do with my assessment of this team. Granted, Jared Allen had a great game for the first since my 3-year old son was born, but the rest of the team stinks. I wonder if any team in NFL history has given up halftime leads of 10 or more points three times in one season. Well, the Vikes have done it in the first three game to open their season (11, 17 and 20 point leads). I don't know what's going to happen next, but this organization is a complete zoo. It has been for years. I don't think they have the capacity to recover from this and I'm not about to lose any sleep over it, either.

* The Lions aren't quite "there" yet. Sure, they're 3-0 for the first time since 1980 and that's commendable. I do like them and want to see them succeed, but after watching them yesterday, I'm not sold on them. I don't think they have "arrived." Yet. They will be good this year and maybe even make the playoffs (check their schedule and look at their final six games, though...0-6?). Something about Matthew Stafford rubs me the wrong way, but I love Ndamukong Suh. I wouldn't mind naming my next son Ndamukong. Why haven't they marketed this guy's name more? Seriously, KONG. It's who he is.

* The Eagles are America's team. It's true. They spend too much money on things that produce very little to no results and blame everyone else for their problems. Sounds like America to me. Well, at least our government. I do believe in Andy Reid and, at 1-2, they're not done by any means, however, I don't believe in Mike Kafka. That's his name, right?

* The Oakland Raiders are going to win the AFC West. You can quote me on this and when it happens, I'm going to claim that I was the first one who said it. They're better than the Chargers and Denver and KC are horrible. I like what the Raiders have going on and hardly anyone knows about them. Darren McFadden is the best running back in the NFL. I feel bad for Nnamdi Asomugha.

* By the time this season is over, there are going to be some ridiculous statistics on the leader board. They could legitimately approach Madden-esque numbers. Tom Brady is on pace to throw for 7,077 yards and 59 touchdowns (I think he'll only end up with 5,500-45). Darren McFadden is on pace for 2,100 yards rushing and I think he can break 2,000, seriously (who knew?), but what's funny is Wes Welker is on pace for 165 receptions and 2,440 yards receiving. He's half way to 1,000 with 13 games left. Ho-hum. Oh, and by the way, Chris Johnson is on the dark side. He thought he was bigger than his team and he's getting what he deserved. I knew better than to pick him or Arian Foster in my fantasy leagues (I did pick Steven Jackson, though...he'll be back and will be solid).

* After week 3, the best players in the NFL are as follows: 1. Aaron Rodgers, 2. Tom Brady, 3. Clay Matthews, 4. Calvin Johnson, 5. Darren McFadden, 6. Drew Brees, 7. DeMarcus Ware, 8. LeSean McCoy, 9. Ryan Fitzpatrick, 10. Jason Pierre-Paul.

Run your own race

I subscribe to a large number of blogs and spend most of my morning reading each one. A favorite of mine is by Seth Godin. He's a world renowned author and leadership and marketing guru. His revolutionary ideas have the changed the way I approach life. He has a new book coming out tomorrow entitled We Are All Weird (the title alone is captivating, isn't it?) I'm telling you, this man is a genius. I had to share his blog post for today because it echoes much of what I stand for and one of the foremost reasons I started this blog. For more information on Godin, go to sethgodin.com.


Run your own race
By Seth Godin

The rear view mirror is one of the most effective motivational tools ever created.

There's no doubt that many people speed up in the face of competition. We ask, "how'd the rest of the class do?" We listen for someone breathing down our necks. And we discover that competition sometimes brings out our best.

There's a downside, though. Years ago, during my last long-distance swim (across Long Island Sound... cold water, jellyfish, the whole nine yards), the competitiveness was pretty thick. On the boat to the starting line, there were hundreds of swimmers, stretching, bragging, prancing and working themselves up. By the time we hit the water, everyone was swimming someone else's race. The start was an explosion of ego and adrenaline. Twenty minutes later, half the field was exhausted, with three hours left to go.

If you're going to count on the competition to bring out your best work, you've surrendered control over your most important asset. Real achievement comes from racing ahead when no one else sees a path--and holding back when the rush isn't going where you want to go.

If you're dependent on competition then you're counting on the quality of those that show up to determine how well you'll do. Worse, you've signed up for a career of faux death matches as the only way to do your best work.

Self motivation is and always will be the most important form of motivation. Driving with your eyes on the rear view mirror is exhausting. It's easier than ever to measure your performance against others, but if it's not helping you with your mission, stop.

A thought on potential

Micaiah is nearly 14 months old and is my youngest son. He's full of life and energy and his attitude is infectious. He emanates joy. He's scared, though. Scared to walk. In the grand scheme of things, it's not important that he walks immediately, however, I see the potential inside of him and want nothing more than for him to "let go."

Micaiah has possessed the necessary skills to be able to walk on his own for over 3 months. While holding on to our hands, the table or other movable and immovable objects he walks with precision and boldness. When he lets go, he suddenly sits or falls to his hands and knees. It's a perfect picture to how everyone handles the potential inside of them.

I know Micaiah can walk on his own, but he's not interested right now. And that's alright. If he would just let go while we're moving around the living room floor, he would see for himself that he can do it. For a 1-year old boy, there's no urgency, but for adults there is.

Has someone pointed out the potential that is inside of you and you're to scared to let go? Micaiah cannot see the potential in himself, but I can. Much the same, we may not be able to see the potential inside ourselves. We need others to speak to our potential. Micaiah cannot comprehend this, but you can. Let go and walk. Tap into the potential that rests inside of you.

Character on display

“You never display your character more clearly than when you speak about the character of others.” – John C. Maxwell

I conducted my very own social experiment last night. I decided to put our character development at Victory into action with a small activity. In a room full of high school boys, there were some uncomfortable individuals because they had to dig deep and go beyond surface level. This is difficult for the male gender.

The objective was to respond to Maxwell's quote above. Each of them had to speak about the character of everyone else in the room. They were instructed to write down the desirable character traits that each person possessed. It forced them to look at the good things others had to offer and it began to reveal their own character. It was fun. Looking for good things in others created a supremely positive atmosphere and everyone felt good. When we honor others, we feel good about doing it. If we truly value others, we should be constantly honoring them.

They gave me their piece of paper as they left and I'm compiling all of the information about each individual. On Thursday, I will give each of them their own piece of paper with all of the great things others said about them (they don't know this yet). I'm not doing it to build their self-esteem; I dislike self-esteem. It was done so they gain self-respect.

The vision I had for this activity is that these young men would take the character traits others see in them and grow to own and embrace who they are so they can step into the greatness they were created for. Until they know who they are, they won't know what to do...identity before activity.

A culture that encourages failure

I worked at a golf course when I was in high school. I was a very good worker, but one day I made a very significant mistake. I was driving a golf cart with a container of gasoline in the back and, unbeknownst to me, the gas tipped over and ran onto the grass across two fairways. Needless to say, it killed the grass, leaving a very distinct stripe that revealed my path. It was the biggest failure I had while working there, however, my boss handled it in a way that was extraordinarily important to my growth as a man.

He called me into his office and said that I had made a huge mistake. One so large, in fact, that he had considered letting me go. He knew I didn't do it on purpose and that I was his best worker, so he kept me on. He and I both knew full well that I would take that failure and turn it into a learning experience to become better. And I did. It had cost him money, but instead of wasting it by firing me, he invested in me.

This picture reflects the environment that is essential to the success of every organization, business and team. The environment that doesn't punish failure is extremely valuable. In my wrestling room, I encourage individuals to take risks, push themselves and, inevitably fail. I must give my athletes the comfort to know that we are engaging in a celebration of experimentation and that failure isn't an option; it's mandatory. This will inevitably lead to emotional margin and even more personal accountability and responsibility.

We live in a world that is hell-bent on punishing us for our mistakes. To be counter-cultural, instead of "giving them hell" for their failures, my objective is to "give them heaven." This changes everything.

Make room for risk and failure in the lives of others. Who they're created to be depends on it. "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." - Anais Nin. Why remain a caterpillar when you were born to be a butterfly?