Kid's State Perspective

I managed to find a quaint corner in the Alliant Energy Center in Madison as we have a short break at the WWF Kid's Folkstyle State Tournament.  I like to reflect on my role and everything that is happening around me when I'm in coaching mode.  This tournament provides an incredible opportunity for many athletes, coaches and parents and I try to maintain a healthy perspective all weekend.

I enjoy going from mat to mat watching wrestlers pour their heart and soul into the sport they love.  As wrestlers, they love to compete.  It's the grind, the fight, that fuels their fire.  Within the realm of competition, those who experience the most success and love for the sport focus on the process.

A parent of an athlete I used to coach asked me how our wrestlers were doing today.  Generally, I respond with the cliche answer: good.  I felt compelled to answer it truthfully this time, though, because I knew what she was asking.  I said, "you know, I have no idea.  It actually doesn't matter to me."  It's true.  It doesn't matter to me.  At sporting events, that question is solely asking if you won or lost, or if you're team is winning more than losing.  How's it going usually means: What place did you take?  Did you win?  What's your record?  That's how sports is too often measured and I don't measure success that way.

I'm competitive (probably more than most).  I love winning and hate losing, however, I measure success by how one approaches competition, not on the outcome alone.  If you control what you can control - attitude and effort - and focus on the process, the outcome is more likely to be desirable than if you're focal point is the outcome.  A concerted effort is required to maintain this perspective because it doesn't come naturally.

The first year I ventured to Kid's State as the Victory School of Wrestling coach, I thought this event provided a unique opportunity to market our brand.  We made t-shirts with names of the qualifiers squeezed on the back.  I was determined to have the most athletes in the tournament of any club in the state.  And we did - 53.  I encouraged athletes to put "Victory School of Wrestling" as their club name on the registration form because we wanted everyone to be sure that we were the best club and it was free advertising.  As I sat mat side that year, I realized that I was operating far outside of my core values as a coach and program.  Of course, I communicated to our athletes that we weren't focused on the outcome, however, our actions indicated otherwise.  I re-evaluated our approach and made a conscious decision to not focus on the outcome.  The number of state qualifiers is not a reliable indicator for the health and success of a youth wrestling club.  There are just too many factors that aren't included in that number.

How many kids do we have down here?  I don't know.  How is Victory doing down here?  If you're referring to wins and loses, then I don't know.  I don't know on purpose.  I try hard not to know.  What I can tell you is the athletes I've been mat side with are enjoying this opportunity.  They're growing as young men and women.  They're having fun and they know, without hesitation, that tomorrow is Sunday regardless of the outcome of today.  Win or lose, they're better today than they were yesterday.  So, if that's what you're asking, then it's going great!

Once a Wildcat, always a Wildcat

This week the news of my transition into the high school coaching world became official.  I'll be the head wrestling coach at River Falls High School, my alma mater, for the 2013-14 season.  This is a role that I've been interested in since I was in middle school and God's perfect timing has created a unique opportunity that will allow me to dive into this adventure while maintaining my identity and standards as a husband, father and coach.

I've spent the last 8 months discussing how I can best be involved with the future of this program with the administration.  We've been putting together necessary pieces of the puzzle in order to take important steps in a new direction that will enable River Falls Wrestling to become a prominent program once again.  As this time had been approaching, I was eager to engage in the many challenges ahead.  I've also been intrigued by the opportunities to learn and grow.  Learning on the job didn't take long. 

If I stacked up my accomplishments in the sport of wrestling, assuming the role of head coach for a disjointed and flailing high school program wouldn't climb very high up the list.  However, I've been flooded with congratulatory messages, words of encouragement and good fortune and support from many important and prominent figures in my life as well as a variety of random individuals, some who I've never met.  It's been quite the humbling experience.  It plainly shows me that people still care about this program and that high school athletics are extremely important.  They're important to athletes, parents, coaches, administrators and the entire community.  Often times, the discourse is drowned by a culture that supports a non-competive, participatory mindset, but deep down, the competitive nature of high school sports is still very important to people no matter how much it's down played.  People want to be a part of something successful and high school athletics often defines much of a community's identity.  It's extremely evident that this community is hungry for a successful wrestling program.

Within the past three weeks, I've been nationally recognized for achieving my gold level certification as a part of the National Coaches Education Program and had my third child, however, I've received much more praise for taking the reigns of the River Falls wrestling program.  High school coaches are important to a community because they directly affect the lives of many individuals and they're tangible; they're real.  The allure of national or international success can't be shared as easily in the check-out line at the grocery store.  An addition to my family doesn't have nearly the impact in our community as the addition of quality coach.  Humility sinks in when you realize the world doesn't revolve around you and no one person is bigger than a community who believes in a program.   

Athletic programs in high schools are great complimentary activities to a quality education and they benefit the entire community, not just a coach or a student involved.  They're more than fun or wins and loses.  They're tools to help students learn about life.  They develop a competitive spirit in student-athletes, an attitude that helps them in a modern competitive job market.  It's also difficult to find something that has the potential to humble an individual the way high school athletics can since they're about contributing to something greater than one self.

So, here we go.  We're on our way.  Everything has come full circle...once a Wildcat, always a Wildcat.

Sow the seed

The mayhem of the youth tournament series begins tomorrow with the Kid's Folkstyle State Regionals.  Almost 4,000 athletes will come together in eight separate locations across Wisconsin in an attempt to qualify for the Kid's Folkstyle State Tournament held in Madison in two weeks (over 600 in River Falls alone).  Thrown into the mix for many of these families in the coming weeks are trips to Wisconsin Dells for the Dominate in the Dells tournament and Cedar Falls, IA for the USAW Folkstyle National Championships.

A parent told me last night that he thinks there is more pressure surrounding this event than the state qualifiers for high school athletes.  It's a month that can become a pressure cooker for the youth athletes.

Of course, Victory School of Wrestling offers the "Regional Warm-Up," a program designed to introduce youth athletes to the concept of training for an event.  It's one of the most successful programs we have and I fully recognize the potential it has to "feed the monster" and create still more stress.  That's why it's crucial that we talk about maintaining a healthy perspective to athletes and parents.

In light of healthy perspectives, just imagine the stress that a 10-year old boy could carry over these several weeks.  Mom and Dad have had the hotel rooms reserved and submitted vacation days at work in anticipation of the weeks to come.  Unfortunately, in some degree, the happiness of his family is unintentionally dependent on his success this weekend.  I haven't met a parent that puts this on their children on purpose, however, as adults we have a responsibility to communicate our intentions clearly in order to maintain that important perspective.  This stress is not a hypothetical conversation for many of these families.

A healthy message to a youth athlete is only genuine when it comes from those who are actively practicing the principle of sowing the seed.   There are too many people who sow seeds and lose sight of it when it goes underground.  Often times they dig it up the next day frustrated nothing has happened.  Everyone who sows seeds understand there's a period that growth isn't directly seen; there appears to be no results.  They know that because the seed was properly sown, growth is indeed happening and it takes time to take root and germinate.  Sowing seeds is what youth wrestling is about and we have to be careful to keep that front and center this weekend.

We like things that are measurable, have immediate feedback or things we can count, with progress and cycles, etc.  There are a lot of adults who want to reap right now when, in fact, the seeds are still taking root.  Youth tournaments are part of a process.  In the sports culture it's easy to lose sight of the process because we underestimate the importance of the daily grind and over estimate the rewards.

This weekend isn't about collecting on our investments.  It's not about reaping what sow.  It can't be.  Not yet.  These young athletes are still growing.  They're still trying to take root.  They're not ready for the harvest.  It's our responsibility to make sure those roots are cultivated in fertile ground